I’m not one to belabor a point. Really, I try to say what needs to be said and move on. I simply do not have the time to spend on rehashing, revisiting, reiterating or otherwise continuing to yammer on about a subject once it has been discussed.
However … It has recently come to my attention that a particular subject, which is very dear to me, is in desperate need of revisiting.
I have mentioned before, the importance of having access to a constant heat source. I discussed in detail here the need for public awareness on Nook Neutrality. And I warned, gentle readers, most vehemently of the dangers of living without a cold weather plan here. Yet every day, I receive countless emails, letters and text messages from cold, miserable pets who are living without even the most basic of cold weather essentials. And it concerns me. Greatly.
Friends, if you do not currently have access to a Nook, a hot blanket, a generously sized sunbeam, an oven in the ‘bake’ setting, or a chuffy Daddy Dog beside whom you can nestle and absorb heat — you are in trouble. You must prepare NOW. Winter is coming. I daresay it’s arrival is imminent. You are running out of time to procure the items which will make possible your survival in the frigid, bitter temperatures of the coming season.
In my own home, I am still lacking access to the Nook I am certain is in the basement. But on cool mornings, Mama Dog often turns on the oven in the kitchen to bake or roast something and I am content to lie pressed up to it’s base, soaking up precious warmth and delicious aromas. In the evenings, Daddy Dog frequently places me next to him on the sofa, allowing his overwhelming body heat (from the extra winter pounds he carries year-round) to pass directly to my flank, haunch and bank – my primary heat absorbers. Many days, the children will open the curtains in the family room just enough to allow a Dachshund sized sunbeam to land across the floor so I can replenish my energy stores. Or they will cover me, as I lie in repose on the back of the little couch, with a blanket, towel or Mama Dog’s sweater (which she thoughtfully leaves on the arm of the furniture upon her nighttime retirement). So you see, while I am without Nookability, I am not left to wither and die from the cold.
Ask yourselves, dear friends – how is your human family accommodating you? Do they go out of their way to assure your warmth and comfort? Or do they simply swath you in a tacky holiday-themed sweater or coat and send you into the frigid abyss to be mocked for a fashion disaster over which you have no control? If the answer is the latter – well, you have a serious problem and it needs to addressed immediately. Or sooner.
Do whatever is necessary to make your comfort a priority in your house. Petition your humans. Call your Senators and Representatives. Make your voice heard and heard loudly. DEMAND a Nook. Withhold your household services if you must. Make your needs KNOWN. Your continued comfort and existence depends on your willingness to stand up for your well-being and your ability to convey this very important message to your family: I am COLD and I will not TOLERATE these conditions any longer!
I will be sharing, over the next weeks and months, many tips and helpful plans of action you can use to turn your home into a haven of warmth and comfort throughout the cold weather season. Some may seem drastic, but my reader feedback has shown there are many, many, many of you who are totally unprepared, completely unready and most likely destined to perish without intervention of some sort. I would prefer that not happen.
For the time being, make sure you are seeking warmth wherever and whenever possible – even if it involves rolling yourself up in piles of dirty laundry waiting to be washed. Some of my warmest naps have taken place in Daddy Dog’s discarded shirts. Do your best to express your needs to your humans and take heart for I am here to guide and advise you to a winter season of absolute plushiousness. Thank you for your support.