Anatomy of an Irish Viking Dachshund

Anatomy of an Irish Viking Dachshund

While scientists have long been aware of their unique anatomy, little is actually known about the function and specifics of the Irish-Viking Dachshund’s particularities.  It has been ascertained, through countless hours of research and study, that these elusive animals do possess a structural makeup unlike any other breed.  While the “Haunch” and “Flank” are quite common pieces of canine form, the Irish-Viking Dachshund has other features which make it a fascinating case study.  These include the “Bank” or back flank area; the “Fraunch” or front haunch; the “Frit” or pit of the fraunch; and, most importantly, the “Honk” or haunch/flank concurrence.  Let us explore further …

This Irish-Viking Dachshund was captured in the wild and domesticated. While known primarily for their beards, Irish-Viking Dachshunds are also widely recognized for their extreme susceptibility to sunlight. In this photo, the subject was found unawares – basking and oblivious to our study. Notice that the Haunch, Flank and Bank are positioned so as to be excellent solar receivers. They are crucial to the Irish-Viking Dachshund’s survival in un-plush environments. The primary function of both the Haunch & Fraunch is flexing when stretching or being munchy when adored. The Frit & the Honk facilitate these activities. The Flank & Bank are known for their extreme reflective qualities, as shown in this diagram – notice how they gleam in the laser-like sun. The noble Irish-Viking Dachshund is an enigmatic creature, indeed. We were extremely fortunate to be able to document this amazing life-form for posterity.